The best $85 I've ever spent...

Well, folks, it's been quiet here in Blogland. Dabragdonfamily has been learning to cope with sleep deprivation and nursing issues. I'm doing a lot better with both. A lot better. This has been one of the hardest weeks I can remember, but I think we've turned a corner. I've napped enough to kick the nausea that I always get from lack of sleep, and the stress is abating. And things are becoming more manageable because I'm not worried anymore that I'm starving my baby. You see, I've been using this thing called a nipple shield to help him nurse. They gave it to me at the hospital to solve problems too graphic for my male readers. =) But the problem is that all the naturalist La Leche people hate this thing. Some people treat it like baby crack. They made me sign a waiver at the hospital before they'd let me take this little plastic thingy home! I've been worried that it's caused a decrease in milk supply, that he'll just reject my breast because of it, basically anything and everything bad that anyone has mentioned. And when he didn't gain back all his birth weight by yesterday, and when he started fussing at the breast some, I worried. And worried. Because I'm totally responsbible for his food. It's all my fault if he's not getting enough. I'm learning about mommy guilt in a big way. Today, at my wits end, I got professional help. God bless lactation consultants! She was able to show me by weighing him before and after we fed that he is getting more than enough milk from me. She said that these newer nipple shields would NOT cause a decrease in milk supply, and she gave me gradual tips for weaning him off, nothing harsh. And that can be done slowly. His latch on is perfect, and he's getting plenty. I needed sooo badly to hear that everything's ok. She even told me that the jaundice that he has had is the probable cause of him not gaining his birth weight completely back. Why didn't the pediatrician tell me that? He's fired. =) I want to see her now for every appointment. So things are going better for this new mom. I'm finding my stride. I'm even learning how to put him to sleep ala the Baby Whisperer, and it's working! No, I don't have control, but I have coping mechanisms, and that's all I need, just to know that I'm giving him what he needs and we'll be ok. This blog may be quiet; it may not. Next week is my first week without any help, and it'll probably be rocky. God bless my long suffering mother. She's been a saint this week. She's put up with me tearing up, raging hormones, and bad traffic to and from Fairfax today on this mission of mercy. She deserves a jewel in her crown for this week. So until I see you again, please keep praying us through this transitional time, but I am doing some better.