Sorry about not posting our letter of the week “preschool” this week. Our computer was hit with a virus, so our computer guy had to come and get it and fix it up for us. I’m thankful for him… he’s kind, and he doesn’t charge an arm and a leg.
Oh, and if you have a screen pop up that tells you your computer is being attacked by viruses and you need to run antivirus, don’t click anything. It’s a virus that will download on your hard drive if you click anything. Shut down the computer, unplug your internet connection, and hope it didn’t get on there… Never, under any circumstances, should you sign up for this program’s “antivirus software.” They will take your credit card info… and then steal you blind. I’m glad I don’t know anything about the stealing thing firsthand.
The computer virus was a bad thing, but not such a bad thing. I actually enjoyed the internet fast. It’s been too long since I’ve done one. Since the computer is in my kitchen, its far too easy to pop on it when the boys are playing. I have an easier time concentrating and being a part of their play if I’m sitting with a book on my lap than with the computer screen up.
And in the past few days of computer free living, Evan has learned to walk. He’s truly walking now, at least half the time. He can push himself up to standing, and then he stumbles from place to place like a tiny drunken sailor. He can even carry us books, and when he falls down, he says, “Boom!” It’s stinkin’ cute.
In other news, I may be scarce on here, or I may be posting a lot. We’re entering another season of lots of work for David and single motherhood for me. Could be 3 weeks, could be longer. If you think of us, pray for us. I am struggling with anger and frustration and a trapped feeling.
I need to learn how to give David’s job over to God. This is the 3rd year he’s been with the job. The first year was great, the 2nd year sucked, and the 3rd year has been hard at times. I thought last year was a fluke, but I’m learning that the things I hate will apparently be with us always. That’s hard for me to accept. I fight it. I don’t want to make everybody around me miserable with my bad attitude, so I’m trying to learn how to cope better. I’ve been blessed to have family and friends help me when we’re daddyless around here, though I can’t do very much to lighten my husband’s load. We’re going to make it… but it’s hard for me.
3 comments:
Hey girl! I get the love/hate relationship with hubby's job...you know I have one with Drew's. I hate how much he works and that he seems to take on most of it himself. (Which I don't think is one of David’s problems since he’s job is so different from what Drew does. When there’s a trial there’s a trial and you have to do what you have to do. But Drew gives 250% at work and is always stepping into a project to help save the day or taking on creating some new program or software or… LOL!) But that is why Drew does so well and in turn allows me to stay at home where I really want to be. (Finally there’s the love part! LOL!) I also have a great support system around me...but I also found that when I took the attitude--I CAN DO THIS!! It really got a lot better for me.
This enlightenment came after having a little heart to heart with my mom. We’re still thinking we want another baby...NOT YET...but someday. :) And she kept saying to really think about it and is it a good idea as much as Drew works. Then it hit me...I rely on my parents and friends a lot (which is good and I am very blessed to have that help). I wanted these three beautiful kids and I still want one more...it was time to decide I CAN do this when Drew has to work long hours or travel. If we are lucky enough (when we feel it’s the right time) to have one more I don’t want anyone thinking I can’t handle it. I’m not saying I don’t still have SUPER hard--all I want is for Drew to come home right NOW or I’ll pull my hair out--days. Last week when both the boys had croup and were crying to be held I called my mom and begged her to come over after she was done at school to just hold one of them. It’s still hard...but with prayer and a little self pep talk my attitude has changed. :)
I’m not saying I love Drew’s job now...I still dislike it a lot...but things have gotten better. Recently at Wednesday night church I’ve had a couple different people comment that they couldn’t believe I’ve gotten everyone to church on my own and had it together. (I hope they really meant it and not just looking for something nice to say. LOL!) But I’m trying. I get what you’re going through. I wish I was there so we could help each other out when our hubby’s have to work so hard!
But I know what an amazing strong woman you are. I will be praying for you while David has to work so much...but I know YOU CAN DO IT! :)
There is a lot of wisdom in your comment, Amy. Thanks. I'm trying to learn to manage well here with confidence and a good attitude as well... but it's requiring maturity from me that is hard won. =)
Hang in there--from one mom/attorney's-wife to another. The Lord uses these situations to sanctify us, teach us our dependence on Him, and to make us look more like Christ.
Being a mom does mean that constant giving of mental, physical, and emotional energy to the raising of our children as the next godly generation. Being a wife also means giving our mental, physical and emotional energy to our husbands--exhausted as we may be from having given it away all day as well! I'm not telling you anything you don't already know and believe. But believe these things too: the Lord gives strength and grace. He has promised to give us all we need for life and godliness, and His promises never fail.
I appreciate your candor on your blog--I hear ya! But do give it to the Lord and ask Him for strength and joy to set about the tasks He has ordained for you.
I type this as my atty husband is at a firm retreat far away and I'm pulling the "single mom" shift for the next little bit ;0) Praying the same things for myself, Catrin
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