I went in for an ultrasound early on Sunday morning. Fertility clincs have to be open for these kinds of appointments on weekends. Cycling doesn't follow weekend closing hours. =) Anyhoo, I got there at 8:15, and my doctor was waiting for me. He's lowered my dosage after my last ultrasond to 50 iu for the past couple of days. Well, looks like he was right to do it. I had a hormone surge apparently, and I had one follicle at almost 17 mm, and two close behind it at 16 mm.
I wasn't expecting to see that on the screen. By my calculations, I still had a few days before maturity. I like Dr. Park. He's a young doctor who just joined the practice, and he's been through infertility himself. I suspect that can make a difference in your sympathy for your patients. He explained that my follicles might already be mature, though there was a greater chance that they are once they reach 18. He wanted me to go ahead and give myself the "trigger shot" of Ovidril. Ovidril is synthetic HSG, and it stimulates your ovaries to drop their load. =) The egg drops sometime within 24-48 hours after you take the shot, so by that time, it will probably reach 18.
I went to have blood drawn, still a little stunned, and there was another gal waiting in the room. I asked her where she was in her cycle. She was also taking Follitism, and this was her second cycle. She said, "You know, this one doesn't look anything like the first one." I was able to share with her that the same thing had happened to me the first time I did this, but I got pregnant on the second round. She seemed relieved and asked me about Seth. I wonder if God had me go in at the same time because she needed some encouragement.
David couldn't be with me at church because he had to work. I slid into my seat, alone, after dropping Seth at the nursery. The praise team was gearing up with "Not to us, but to your name be the glory..." I was fighting back tears as I worshipped. I have been careful in my words in this process, making sure to say that the outcome of my treatments is all up to God. I want to always believe what I'm saying with my mouth.
It is easy to think sometimes that the medicine is what gets you pregnant. It's not. God has total dominion over this. Any good that medicine can do, He can stop in its tracks if He wants. And He can overcome anything that medicine cannot do. I have no control. And if I get pregnant with another child, He alone should get the glory.
Sunday afternoon was kind of nervewracking. I sat around, read the directions on the Ovidril carefully for the second time, took a nap, and then gave myself the shot. This one hurt like the dickens. Thicker, longer needle, I guess.
This morning, I am relieved. The shots are over for this time. I have done what I needed to do. From a medical standpoint, the cycle went very smoothly. Now only time will tell whether God will bless this with a baby. I start taking progesterone on Friday to help sustain a pregnancy if there is one. A pregnancy test is still a couple of weeks out. It's going to be a long two weeks...
3 comments:
I am glad that you are sharing all of this. I've known plenty of women have had these struggles but aren't very open (understandably) and I never want to pry.
You have a great way with words and I'm sure someone out there will be blessed and encouraged by it.
Ellen,
I really appreciate this series. I am praying for you and David and Seth.
Praying for you always, especially over the next two weeks :)
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