Thoughts on the second child...

I don't know where the last 6 weeks went. =)

But I thought I'd take this moment when Evan is sleeping sweetly in his swing to write a couple of thoughts about them.

One thing we've learned is that Evan is not Seth. =) Sounds simple, but I think that you really unconsciously think your second will do things just like your first. Until you're proven wrong.

For one thing, Evan will let you know in no uncertain terms how he feels about things. There's not much soft crying or whining on the way to Unhappyville. He ramps up pretty quickly to eardrum blasting banshee screaming. I'm talking red face, sweat coming out of every pore, hair getting wet and turning curly from it, kind of screaming. We're used to it at this point, but it still takes our guests by surprise.

He also doesn't sleep like Seth. Now granted, Seth was sleeping 12 hours at night from the time he was a teeny baby. He wasn't supposed to, but he did, because he had jaundice. And by the time the jaundice was completely gone, he was just supposed to sleep longer, I guess. So we were kinda clueless about the expected newborn sleeping pattern...

So we made the mistake of trying to put Evan down too early at night, before he was really sleepy. For a couple of weeks. =) So I guess the marathon nighttime screaming fits were our fault. He's doing better at night now that we've stopped that. But he's still harder to calm down in the evening than Seth was, and after a few weeks of using the same techniques that he used with Seth, David realized that they weren't working... at all. And he's not quick to change plans midstream. Let's just say that we're not going to be swaddling him, putting him down drowsy, and walking away to let him fall asleep on his own for a little while longer. =)

But at this point, Evan is going down relatively calmly between 10:30 and midnight, sleeping until 5:00ish, eating, and then going back to sleep until 8:00. We've made significant progress... Last night he woke me up to eat at 5:30, but he still went right back to sleep without being rocked or walked. Yeah!!!

There are times when I've complained because Evan isn't as easy of a baby as Seth was. I can't count the number of times that I've said, "This baby would be happy as a clam if I strapped him to me 24 hours a day." And I'm complaining, not rejoicing. And then one day I thought, "Why am I not rejoicing about this? After all, I did ask God to give me a snuggly baby. And that's exactly what He did. I'll still take the down side of not having my hands free much to get a snuggler." Because, really, Evan's unhappiness stops immediately if I pick him up. And if he falls asleep on my shoulder, then he's really in heaven. He's like a puppy. =)

And Evan really isn't a difficult baby. I just had a very compliant baby to start out with. So a baby that's even a little bit less easily contented seems tougher in comparison. And I also think I have a bad baby memory of the early days. I think I'm certainly making them out to be a little easier than they were.

This is rambling, and it probably doesn't seem like it has a point, but I guess my point is this: Evan has bewildered us both because we expected something a little different. And that's made me disgruntled at times. But I'm now starting to be able to laugh at myself for expecting another miniature Seth, and I'm starting to relax and appreciate Evan for who he is and see the best in him. We don't have to understand exactly how he works right now, and it'll probably change next week anyway. We'll just keep working toward family goals, and we'll accept that the ways we get to them might be a little bit different.

The end. =)